The scene: Batting down the M4 to Gloucestershire (pronouced Glosstersheer to those of you unsure), on our way to the 5th birthday party of a friend's daughter. We were Late - as ever. In quite the dirtiest car you have ever seen, although this has more to do with the fact that we seem to have spent the weekend on the roads, and the motorway authority's excessive use of gritting lorries, than the fact we have been particularly remiss at keeping our car clean.
I mean, really, what goes on in those motorway control centres? "Boss, boss! It's going to down to 5 degC tonight! Can I send out the gritters?" "Now, Cheryl, you know we're not supposed to send the lads out unless it's 4 degC or below..." "Oh, but please boss, please. I just love watching them all lined up and ready to go at 3am, fully-loaded with salt and determination, lights blazing, thermos flasks full of tea balanced on the dashboards, 'Bat out of Hell' blaring out on the overhead PA system, engines roaring, and beer-bellies resting precariously on the steering wheels..." "Cheryl! Cheryl! Come back to us! Don't look into the light, Cheryl! Someone, quick, turn on the tv! See if you can find any darts championships and turn the volume up LOUD!"
Anyway, I'm rambling...
Back to the anecdote I meant to share. I was driving, comfortable in the knowledge that the situation that took place the last time we visited these friends - namely, a blazing row over getting lost in the back streets of Cirencester, with Husband hissing instructions at me and my ignoring them - would not happen again, because this time - this time - we had the forethought to print off a map of how to get to our destination.
We took the turn-off from the motorway.
Me: "Which way from here?"
Husband: "Hang on. I'll check the map... Where is the map?"
Me: "I don't know. I thought it was by your seat? Isn't that it, on the floor?"
Husband: "No, that's the map from yesterday. What did you do with today's?"
Me: "Me? What did I do with today's?"
Husband: "Yes, today's. I gave it to you, remember? Before we left? I picked up the bags and the Boys and said, could you lock up and bring the map with you?"
Husband: "You forgot it, didn't you?"
Me: "....................God, these windows are dirty. I can barely see in the wing mirrors...."
I have no excuse. We did make it though - and without the hissing. Which was nice.