>> Wednesday, 19 November 2008
I'm in trouble. I mentioned in a previous post that Boy #1's Christmas (i.e. Nativity) play is fast approaching. So far, so good, so sit in the audience snivelling a little at how he's grown, fishing desperately for a clean handkerchief in my bag and finding only a used remnant from some time last summer...
But there's a problem.
This play is 'in costume'.
Now, I can at least thank my lucky stars that unlike the mums / grandmothers / nannies / paid help of the families of the 3 little boys who need to dress as Elvis (the King), I don't have to spend the next 2 weeks sourcing a white jumpsuit and sewing spangles and sequins onto it. (What on earth are spangles, by the way? I think I first heard the term in a Ballet Shoes book around 30 years ago, and I still don't know... And no clever answers telling me they're a sweet from the 1970's and 80's either, please. Those I do remember - and can still taste the orange ones now.)
So, no Elvis.
No, Boy #1 is going to be dressed as a waiter (that well-known character in the timeless Christmas story). Which means black trousers, and a white shirt - both of which are easily found and can be pressed into service at Christmas lunch if we want pocket-sized help to carry complicated stuff into the dining room at my parent's. Complicated stuff like... napkins, that is.
It's the third item on the costume list we received by letter from the school that is bothering me.
He needs an apron. A white, waiter's apron.
Bearing in mind that at school my home economics teacher used to have the same reaction to my sewing that my sports teacher used to have to my tennis - to wander past slowly, sorrowfully shaking her head - you will understand when I tell you that my first instinct was to source this on the internet. Unsuccessfully, of course. I mean, who in their right mind would stock a white waiter's apron for a 5 year old?
And as my Mother in Law, otherwise known as 'she who can rustle up a child's kilt at a moment's notice' (which was lucky, as she had to do just that for last year's festive extravaganza - click if you want to see just how out of control a nursery drama teacher can get when her medication runs out) is out of the country for the next week or so, I can't even turn to her for help on this one.
I am, horrors, going to have to Make This One Myself.
It's just me, a new white tea towel that I plan to butcher into a suitable shape, and some of 'that tape they use on seams' to make the ties. You see, I'm so rubbish at this, I don't even know what the tape is called. They're going to laugh me out of the Peter Jones haberdashery department when I go there tomorrow to buy some...
Oh well. At least the tea-towel / apron will be washable to get rid of the blood and chocolate stains. Blood from my fingers, and chocolate, well, because why not? It is nearly Christmas, after all.