You know you've earned your Duke of Edinburgh Bronze Parenting Award when...
1. You, who used to blaspheme for Britain at the slightest opportunity, catch yourself using one of the following as a curse word, even when there is no-one around...
For Goodness' sake!
2. You find yourself turning round to point out the tractor blocking the road to your cherubs in the back of the car - and realise it's the middle of the school morning and there is no-one to view it's yellow JCB-ness but you.
3. You get more pleasure out of shopping for your children than for yourself. There is less trying on, no extra poundage/roll of flab/tummy sucking in issue, and most importantly, you can get a complete outfit for them in Gap without breaking a credit-card related (will they/won't refuse the Visa?) sweat
4. You know the words - dammit! - to Chuggington on C-beebies
5. You feel a sense of achievement when you catch yourself checking your childrens' school uniform for cleanliness and suitability for another day's wear when they take it off rather than first thing in the morning. This removes the necessity for last minute tumble-drying and / or yesterday's sock recycling. (Though isn't the latter better for the environment?)
6. You find yourself googling 'how to draw a horse' and being quite impressed with your own efforts in that direction. Hell, no-one else is going to do it, the original request came from your son who - five minutes in - rushed off to play Power Rangers elsewhere.
7. You remove a sizeable splinter from your younger son's hand without resorting to a trip to A&E. OK, so there was chocolate involved. Want to make something of that?
8. Both Boys are asleep in bed by 7.30pm having fallen for your "gosh, look how late it is! Off to bed now!" routine a dastardly half an hour earlier than normal. And you don't feel guilty in the least about fibbing to them.
Now. How do we get to Silver and Gold? Anyone?