Trip trapping across that rickety bridge; the perils of sharing online

>> Friday, 1 February 2013

It's a funny old lark, this blogging game.  I've been very fortunate here on 'The Potty Diaries'; in the nearly 6 years I've been writing it, I have had only a handful of visits from those poor individuals who live under bridges and who make it their raison d'etre to spread pain across the internet with cruel and personal remarks in the comment box.  Oh, there may be people who comment elsewhere what a waste of time it is to visit here, but I don't seek such threads out (if they even exist).  Why bother, frankly?

Thing is though, 'The Potty Diaries' is not the only place I write.  A post I put up elsewhere recently attracted a damning remark about how mundane and boring my life is, with the inference being that I really should sort myself out and make my life a little more 'out there', entertaining, and frankly interesting to read about.

I won't lie to you; all my principles about not engaging in conversation with such people were put to the test.  This remark stung.  Well, no-one likes to be told that they're boring, do they? But I sat on my hands, and haven't responded, and don't plan on it; the more time passes, the less I'm bothered by it, and the further I can rise above it.

What I would have liked to say, of course, was "If you find my writing dull, please; feel free not to read."  But I managed not to do it ('Never engage, never engage, never engage'), and am instead quietly smiling to myself on the irony of the situation. This person clearly has no idea of how hard Husband and I work to fill our family's life with the peace and calm that she chooses to interpret as mundane and boring.  Life here could be frantic, fraught, filled with insurmountable stressful problems, twice-hourly injections of cortisol into my over-active brain. I could be writing black humoured desperate 'I'm so unhappy' 'This place saps the soul from you' 'I can't take another tangle with bureaucracy / the militia / that sour-faced bxtch at the checkout / other drivers' type posts, but guess what?

It would drive me as crazy to see the world through those glasses as it would you to read about it.

And as for the stuff that really does happen here but which I would be sticking my head far too high above the parapet (in a not-totally friendly environment) if I wrote about it, I put my family's well-being way above any need to entertain online.  So I think I'll stick with the 'mundane & boring' for the moment, thank you very much - and save the anecdotes about meetings with gun runners, the run-ins with oligarchs wives, and the discovery of listening posts in neighbours' houses and such-like for my memoirs once we've left...


manycoloured-days 1 February 2013 at 18:51  

Give us the link and we'll answer her for you :) please, she probably envies your boring life. People who leave hurtful comments usually are not the happy ones.

Iota 1 February 2013 at 22:17  

I think it always sounds like you have an exciting life. Jumping in ice pools, going to Turkish baths, learning to speak a new language, learning to live in a new culture, being a free-lance writer, HAVING YOUR OWN PHOTOGRAPHY EXHIBITION for heaven's sake. Any one of those would sound impressive at the kind of social gatherings I go to.

MsCaroline 2 February 2013 at 01:16  

Iota said exactly what I was thinking- sounds like your 'friend' hasn't read much of your blog. Frankly, sounds like the commenter is the one with the boring life if she has nothing better to do than post negative comments on blogs. And good for you for not engaging - they say it's always best not to feed the trolls.

nappy valley girl 2 February 2013 at 15:00  

I had a similar comment once, years ago when I first started the blog, and while it did upset me, you do have to wonder why on earth they are bothering to read/comment on your blog if they find it so boring.

Your life sounds very exciting - I bet you will write a fascinating book afterwards. (BTW have just read a book called The Expats, by Chris Pavone set in Luxembourg - might appeal to you!)

DD's Diary 5 February 2013 at 14:17  

How horrible for you, but don't let this person get to you - you write beautifully - and NEVER boringly - and that's why you have such a loyal following xx

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