Remembering why I blog - the moving diary

>> Wednesday, 1 July 2015

It's been quiet on this blog for a couple of weeks now.

It's not that there's nothing happening; there's plenty going on in our lives.  We're preparing for an international move, the Boys have just finished at the only school either of them can remember, and we're ticking off items on our 'Say Goodbye To Moscow' bucket list.  We need to find a base in our new home-town, set everything up for a smooth arrival there, and re-establish some dormant relationships in the UK.

Having said all that, it feels like the calm before the storm.

Practically, I know that isn't the case.  We've had an emotional few weeks - months, really, if I think about it - as we've gone through the mill of taking the decision to leave Russia, identifying where where we want to live back in the UK, applied for school places for the kids, been accepted (thank heavens), and dealt with the slowly dawning reality of what it will actually mean to leave the supportive community in a challenging environment that we've been living in for the last six years.  More recently there have been tears as my children have said farewell to good friends and I've held my nerve to assure them that yes, they WILL make new ones, it may just take a little time.  And of course Husband and I have attended a host of leaving parties, both for ourselves and for other people we know who are leaving Moscow.

Since the the school bell rang for the last time two weeks ago I've continued to sell / recycle / donate or just plain throw out the stuff we've acquired during our stay here and don't plan to move back with us.  In addition, there's been the small matter of housing, buying new uniforms for the children, and making a flying visit back to Blighty for them to attend New Starter events at their new schools to deal with.

We're back in Moscow now for a couple of week's hiatus before the we move out of our house here.  I feel as if I should be tidying - I KNOW I should be tidying - but actually there doesn't seem to be much left to tidy.  I've been through the kitchen cupboards, I've given away the clothes the kids and I no longer wear, I've got rid of a load of paperwork.  The only 'big' job now outstanding is to go through the Boys toys, but that can wait a couple of weeks longer.

And it's quiet - oh, so quiet.  The communities we normally socialise with - Russian and expat - have mostly packed their bags and flown, either to their dacha, home country, or somewhere else for a few weeks or for good, depending on their plans.  The Boys are in day camp, and Husband is travelling for business.  I feel as if I should be making the most of my time, doing, I don't know, something, but instead feel as if I'm stuck, dealing with the small tasks of running our day-to-day lives but unable to settle down and get my teeth into the big ones, like starting to actually write the next book that I've tentatively planned out, for example.  Or to  make initial approaches to a host of agents that I've never met, no doubt waiting with bated breath to hear about my last one.

Apologies for what may seem like nothing post, but it helps, to sit here and blog; it reminds me why I started doing this back in 2007.  What can seem at the time like a total lack of progress, whether it's the frustration of potty training a small child, dealing with the 'hurry up and wait' timetable of looking after two young children, or the ups and downs and sometimes what seemed like the interminable 'on and on-ness'* of being the main carer at home, my blog helps me take stock and realise that yes, I am moving forward.

And I can see that actually, this is not the calm before the storm.  Having written all this down, I've realised that actually, I'm right in the centre of it.  The eye of the hurricane.

* an expression borrowed from my good friend Jennifer, who blogs here and here.


Nappyvalleygirl,  1 July 2015 at 11:12  

It sounds to me like you've done all of the hard work. I remember that feeling too - like you should be packing or something, but actually there isn't anything left to do until the packers come. I got to the stage where I couldn't face any more sorting out of toys, and just piled them into boxes and shipped them back.

I think blogging's great for getting you through times like this. I certainly found it really helped me through my move to the States and back. There is less time for it when life is busy and on an even keel.

Good luck with the move and everything --exciting as well as stressful, from what I recall from 2 years ago this week....

London City Mum 1 July 2015 at 11:51  

Blogging is good for the spirit: it calms, it reassures, it revitalises. Looking forward to welcoming you back!


pottymummy,  1 July 2015 at 13:34  

God - have you been back two years? It really doesn't seem that long... Looking forward to catching up!

pottymummy,  1 July 2015 at 13:34  

Thankyou LCM!

Muddling Along 1 July 2015 at 14:29  

Keep on putting one foot infront of the other - an international move is such a big thing physically and emotionally and you've done so much and are stuck in this holding pattern now
Looking forward to having you back Blighty-side

Jennifer Eremeeva,  1 July 2015 at 15:02  

Thanks for the mention, PM. Obvs we need to go out and do some damage here i the Big Potato...

Iota Manhattan 1 July 2015 at 18:11  

Ah, not surprised you are leaving sorting out the toys till last. Always hard to say goodbye to those...

Hurrying up and waiting is so hard, isn't it? You capture it very well. I like Muddling Along's image of being in a holding pattern.

Mwa 4 July 2015 at 17:31  

It's funny what seems like nothing-blogging to you is very interesting. Moving countries, all that entails. Good luck with it!

MsCaroline,  6 July 2015 at 13:25  

Well, speaking as someone who's just come out of the eye of the hurricane (international move #2) I certainly don't envy you, but it does sound like you've got everything taken care of - in a far more orderly manner than I did. Enjoy your remaining time in Moscow. I'll look forward to hearing about your impressions upon your return!!!

notefromlapland 7 July 2015 at 13:45  

yup, it's certainly a hurricane. Good luck with it all. And when you get back to blighty I think there will have to be nattering over wine taking place.

pottymummy,  8 July 2015 at 11:35  

Me too, MA! x

pottymummy,  8 July 2015 at 11:35  

Goes without saying, Jennifer... x

pottymummy,  8 July 2015 at 11:36  

Have to admit that I personally won't be sorry to say goodbye to some of the Lego shrapnel. Although, as you can see in the subsequent post, their fascination with that continues - so maybe we'll be saying goodbye to less of it than I might like...

pottymummy,  8 July 2015 at 11:37  

Thinking of upping sticks yourself, Mwa? (Not for the first time, I know)

pottymummy,  8 July 2015 at 11:37  

I talk a good game Ms C - le't see how much of my supposed forward planning actually helps!

pottymummy,  8 July 2015 at 11:37  

I think it would be rude not to!

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