So, you think you know everything...

>> Friday, 9 September 2011

"How do you know that?" Boy #1 asked me when I pointed out that he hadn't made his bed today and reminded him that if he wanted a star for his chart, he should go and sort it.

"Because I am the Mummy. And I know everything" I replied.


"But how do you know that?" Boy #1 asked again during a conversation about ancient Egypt, sarcophogi and canopic jars.

"Because, I learned it at school. And of course, because I am the Mummy. So I know everything about Ancient Egypt..."


"But how do you know that 23 is 'greater than' 18? How?" during his maths homework.

"Because it just is - here's a number line to show you, and 'greater than' means 'more than' or, 'a bigger number than'. And, of course..."

"...because you are the Mummy. And you know everything."

"That's right, my child. You are finally getting it."

But Boy #1 had had enough. "You don't! You don't know everything! Who was it, in Star Wars Episode 2, who had their head severed off in the arena?"

"Ummm.... Count Dooku?"

"No! You see, you DON'T know everything. Ha! It was Boba Fett!"

Dammit. Apparently I don't know everything. I'm going to have to find another tag-line


MrsB @ crankymonkeys in london 9 September 2011 at 09:16  

They always catch you out with Star Wars :)

Jo Beaufoix 9 September 2011 at 13:10  

Hee hee, they always manage to catch us out don't they? I would have been hopeless at that question.

Now if they were asking about Nanny McPhee or Matilda I'd have had a chance as my two have been obsessed with those films this summer. Hope you're alright lovely. xx

Iota 9 September 2011 at 13:17  

I'm a mummy, and I don't know about canopic jars, so there's a fault in your logic somewhere.

Yesterday I spent an hour looking online for the best mobile phone deal for 14-yo, and I tell ya, it's teenagers who know everything, not mummies. I'm reading the small print and asking him "what does that mean? how do you know whether you're liable for extra charges or not? where does it say that? how do you KNOW that?" and he's replying with what used to be MY line: "I just know". Wah.

Knackered Mother 9 September 2011 at 23:23  

How about "The Mummy Who Knows Everything. Apart from Star Wars". Catchy, non?

MsCaroline 10 September 2011 at 02:04  

I recommend the addition of the disclaimer "....mostly" to the end of all such statements. It still makes you sound like you know a lot, but helps save face if you run into the odd fact that wasn't included in the Mummy Handbook you were given at the birth of Boy#1.

Potty Mummy 12 September 2011 at 08:01  

Mrs B, that pesky movie...

Jo, I'm fine thanks and yes, I may have done better on Nanny McPhee too. Though I have just emailed someone trying to turn them to the Dark Side, so maybe I am learning.

Iota, what? Did you miss the canopic jars seminar at your nct meetings? Shame...

KM, well...

MsC, 'mostly'. I like that.

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