Him: "So, I hope you're impressed that I did the laundry whilst you were away last weekend."
Let's be clear here; I was away 3 1/2 days. One load got done.
Me (thinking, 'how best to deal with this one?'): "....Well, I'm not impressed - you are a grown man, after all... But (come on, let's acknowledge this somehow, and he did have paid work to do as well as holding the fort whilst I swanned off to London without them, footloose and fancy-free...) I am glad that you did it..."
What would you have said, though?
I have learnt that they need to tell you everything they have donw, I often respond my doing a precise of my day. "I picked up 3 pairs of socks" etc. Or just respond in a good boy manner - boys and men are like dogs!
ReplyDeleteI would have responded with lots of praise like you do with a puppy or a kid when they have done something you want them to do again. It is wrong that we should appreciate it - however if we want it repeated we need to engage in training!
ReplyDelete"So you DO know where the washing machine is located then?"
ReplyDeleteOr words to that effect.
I would still have had to deal with the aftermath of sorting, folding and putting away.
But, credit where credit is due...
LCM x
I probably would have said the same thing as you and instantly regretted it:)
ReplyDelete"yes, and I was hoping this was the start of a new regime".
ReplyDelete3 1/2 days and one load? Would barely make a dent in our laundry pile that! But a huge improvement on my husband who has just stepped over a pile of his clothes all clean and ready to go upstairs. Grrrr.
But did he put the clothes away? That's usually the rub. I think lots of praise. It's like toilet training the puppy. Lots of shit to deal with but at least he's getting the right idea! ;-p A couple of posts about expat women's experience different to men's if you're interested.
ReplyDeleteI would be impressed that my husband had manged to work out how to use the washing machine.
ReplyDeletePositive re-enforcement is the way to go.
I would have hit him over the head with a stack of clean underwear.
ReplyDeleteMine did more than one load (I'm told) but put all the clothes away creased, so I got them all out again and put them in the ironing pile. Pah! I just don't say anything these days - gets the message across that I'm not too impressed.
ReplyDeleteI am currently busting a gut to get child and dog care coverage for three days while I'm at CyberMummy, and the Ball & Chain thinks he might play golf on one of those days! I may have to have a conversation about the fact that I do not organise childcare for him to play golf. He can wait till I get back.
What would I have said? Hmmm, now let me think about this one.
ReplyDelete"Are you seeing someone else?"
CJ xx
Oh, I think I'd have responded with just a look. But quite an impressive look.
ReplyDelete(I'm on a blogging break, I know, I know.)
I am not that easily impressed. I don't think my husband would dare to utter that sentence. :-)
ReplyDelete"I am indeed impressed. I had no idea that you even knew where to find the laundry machine." hint. hint.
ReplyDeleteSeriously, it's good when they do anything and I think they need us to make a big deal over it.
"and you did it so well darling! fabulous." as you admire single pile of clean laundry, stroking it whilst adopting clearly impressed expression, "downside is that you've shown me up: now you know what truly clean clothes look like. your job from here on until eternity i think - or your collars and cuffs are going to be a perpetual disappointment for ever afterwards". and then i'd have handed him the Arielski. or whatever Russian equivalent is called x
ReplyDeleteThat was so diplomatic that I'm going to nominate you as the successor to Ban Ki Moon.
ReplyDeleteI don't know what I WOULD have said, but when I return in July with EXACTLY this scenario to hand, this is what I will say.
xo
I'd have gone with "Aren't you clever? Aren't you a darling? Aren't I the luckiest!" in hopes that would mean repeat tidiness performances in the future, but then he'd probably see right through that :)
ReplyDeleteI'd say: "yes, & hopefully it makes you realise how massively impressive I am to not only do a load of laundry EVERY day, but also look after 2 boys, cook supper, do the shopping, tidy up, iron the clothes, water the plants, make the beds, AND update my blog!"
ReplyDeleteyou're kidding.. how did you get yours to actually do the laundry, let alone figure out how to work the washing machine?!!!
ReplyDeleteAnd I hope you're proud I managed to carry on breathing whilst away darling... ?
ReplyDeleteI would say, "That's very sweet of you. I really appreciate your taking the time and effort to do it." I know his remark is sarcastic, but it wouldn't do any good to retort in an equally sarcastic or any other provoking way.
ReplyDeleteMH, you are of course right!
ReplyDeleteMoiderer, I know - maddening, isn't it?
LCM - you didn't actually think he put it AWAY, do you? Now that would be worth praise...
NVG, why regret it?
PWN, humph! That's all I can say on that. Humph!
Vix, of COURSE he didn't.
PW, I know it. Still annoys me, though...
Nora - tempting...
EPM, just had the same conversation about golf with a friend who's in a similar position to you. What on earth are they thinking of, these men?
CJ, what - do you mean that the other woman would have had to be the one to do the laundry?
Iota, no comment (but I love that you did...)
Mwa, sounds like you're more sorted than I am then.
CT, thanks for visiting and yes you're right, of course. Tt's still annoying though.
RM, hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaahahahahahahaha. (Nuff said?)
Mothership, I thank you. Although being secretary general of the UN might be a bit easy after the stay at home mum gig, don't you think?
Helen, he most definitely would, dammit.
Paradise, well of course he would agree. Before sitting down to read the newspaper whilst I make dinner.
Buttercup, he probably got my youngest son to show him...
MAM, that would be right over his head.
Maris, here's the thing. His was not a sarcastic remark, but a purely honest request for recognition and admiration at the feat he had achieved. Honestly, it's true. Yes, that is what I'm working with...
"OMG tell me you only washed your clothes and none of mine" (my Barbie size days are well & truly over)
ReplyDelete