... unless it's what you're writing when you're on holiday and haven't had the time to tend to your blog as you normally would, in which case I'm afraid it comes far too easily.
So please, accept my apologies for not commenting on other people's blogs as I normally would. I AM reading them, it's just that the time I devote to this is stolen from teaching the Boys' swimming, sitting reading the latest John Updike, and sipping a glass of rose in the sunshine, so I'm sure you'll agree it's not that high on my list of priorities. Plenty of time for that in what I'm assured is rainy old London when I get home...
Ditto on the comments here. I think it's the height of rudeness not to reply if someone is kind enough to leave a remark in my comments box, but I've given myself a few days off from this, so I hope that hasn't been seen as too rude.
And finally, whilst a lot has been happening not all of it has been bloggable so I'm going to impinge on your good will again and, with your permission, and once more direct you to Powder Room Graffiti, where I am wittering on about how what is supposed to be a feel-good experience - getting a haircut - so often isn't...
Normal service will be resumed shortly, but in the meantime I do beg your pardon for my lack of input. And now I have to go; my glass of rose is getting warm...
Friday, 31 July 2009
Wednesday, 29 July 2009
Excitement - Boy #2 style
Ah, the holidays.
Blue skies, warm temperatures, long and lazy days spent by the pool with your children.
(Although of course we all know that 'lazy' isn't a term that is strictly true, if you count the supermarket shopping that for some reason seems to happen far more frequently in a foreign country, the high alert each time one of the children goes near water, the constant annointings of the kids with sun cream, the constant applications of the same with mosquito repellant, the cooking, tidying, the searching for the lost swim goggles, the searching for the lost swim shorts, and the running back to the supermarket for the extra wine you need because unaccountably you seem to have drunk the half case you bought the day before yesterday in less than 48 hours...)
But still, blue skies, family time, adventures in mysterious castles. Paradise, really.
So what, I wondered, was Boy #2's favourite part of our holiday? Would it be the pool games?
The frequent access to ice-cream? The jousting at the castle (more of which another time)?
Oh no.
"It was when we drove over the railway lines that crossed the road, mummy."
Excitment is a level crossing. Of course.
Blue skies, warm temperatures, long and lazy days spent by the pool with your children.
(Although of course we all know that 'lazy' isn't a term that is strictly true, if you count the supermarket shopping that for some reason seems to happen far more frequently in a foreign country, the high alert each time one of the children goes near water, the constant annointings of the kids with sun cream, the constant applications of the same with mosquito repellant, the cooking, tidying, the searching for the lost swim goggles, the searching for the lost swim shorts, and the running back to the supermarket for the extra wine you need because unaccountably you seem to have drunk the half case you bought the day before yesterday in less than 48 hours...)
But still, blue skies, family time, adventures in mysterious castles. Paradise, really.
So what, I wondered, was Boy #2's favourite part of our holiday? Would it be the pool games?
The frequent access to ice-cream? The jousting at the castle (more of which another time)?
Oh no.
"It was when we drove over the railway lines that crossed the road, mummy."
Excitment is a level crossing. Of course.
Monday, 27 July 2009
Paperback writer...
We're travelling, hence the unaccustomedly long quiet on my part - and the lack of a British Blogging Mummy of the Week. Apologies for that; I even have one all lined up but I've missed my slot so you'll just have to bear the suspence until next Sunday when I'm back in the UK. Can you bear it? Can you? (Don't answer that...)
In the meantime...
Have you ever finished a book and felt - well - 'used'?
No names, no pack drill, but I have, more than once, and it's always my own stupid fault. Firstly I'm of the 'I've started so I'll finish' school of readers, and secondly, I'm a sucker for a '3 for 2' offer. Not always the best of combinations. So I wander into Waterstones, Smiths, Borders, and a title I've read about catches my eye. It's usually well-reviewed, or at the very least by an author whom I like, and I think to myself, AHA! At last, the chance to read some 'quality'...
But then, as I turn and walk towards to the till, I am besieged by a host of alternatives all with those appealing little circular orange stickers on the front cover. Buy me! they say. Not that one. Oh, you'll learn something from that one, that's for sure. You'll enjoy it, no doubt. But will it pull it's weight? Does it count towards the holy grail of a 'free book'? I don't think so... Look, look, all around you, here are my sister titles, also on Buy One Get One Free, my siblings in shame, all of us cheap as chips and twice as nasty... Go on, go on... you know you want to...
And guess what? I do want to. Free books? Who wouldn't? And before I know it my worthy interesting book is left forlornly on a shelf whilst I rifle through chick-lit heaven and I leave the store with a bag full of titles that there is NO WAY I will ever have the nerve to display on the bookshelves, and which - once read - will instead be delivered shame-facedly in a plain brown paper bag to Oxfam in one of my yearly purges....
So anyway, that's how it happens that I frequently find myself reading books that are like candyfloss - too sweet, that leave a disgusting taste in your mouth, and are full of empty calories.
But that's so easy to say. Get me, huh? Passing judgement on other people's hard work and effort. Who am I to say these things and not have had a shot at writing something better myself?
So I decided to have a go at it. Why not?
But you can see the diabolical results over at Powder Room Graffiti. And I warn you; it's not pretty...
In the meantime...
Have you ever finished a book and felt - well - 'used'?
No names, no pack drill, but I have, more than once, and it's always my own stupid fault. Firstly I'm of the 'I've started so I'll finish' school of readers, and secondly, I'm a sucker for a '3 for 2' offer. Not always the best of combinations. So I wander into Waterstones, Smiths, Borders, and a title I've read about catches my eye. It's usually well-reviewed, or at the very least by an author whom I like, and I think to myself, AHA! At last, the chance to read some 'quality'...
But then, as I turn and walk towards to the till, I am besieged by a host of alternatives all with those appealing little circular orange stickers on the front cover. Buy me! they say. Not that one. Oh, you'll learn something from that one, that's for sure. You'll enjoy it, no doubt. But will it pull it's weight? Does it count towards the holy grail of a 'free book'? I don't think so... Look, look, all around you, here are my sister titles, also on Buy One Get One Free, my siblings in shame, all of us cheap as chips and twice as nasty... Go on, go on... you know you want to...
And guess what? I do want to. Free books? Who wouldn't? And before I know it my worthy interesting book is left forlornly on a shelf whilst I rifle through chick-lit heaven and I leave the store with a bag full of titles that there is NO WAY I will ever have the nerve to display on the bookshelves, and which - once read - will instead be delivered shame-facedly in a plain brown paper bag to Oxfam in one of my yearly purges....
So anyway, that's how it happens that I frequently find myself reading books that are like candyfloss - too sweet, that leave a disgusting taste in your mouth, and are full of empty calories.
But that's so easy to say. Get me, huh? Passing judgement on other people's hard work and effort. Who am I to say these things and not have had a shot at writing something better myself?
So I decided to have a go at it. Why not?
But you can see the diabolical results over at Powder Room Graffiti. And I warn you; it's not pretty...
Wednesday, 22 July 2009
AND another thing...
I'm having a rant. If you're in a lovely flowery happy place, click away now...
Still here? Right. Then I'll begin....
First... Why is it that cyclists in London are so self-righteous these days? Obviously they are doing less harm to the environment than car drivers, I get that, but how on earth do they expect to be given the same rights as a car when they don't follow any of the same rules? For example, I can't count the number of times a cyclist has refused to stop or slow down at a pedestrian or a zebra crossing when I'm walking over with my children. And yet, if you challenge them on it, they get all upset. (And yes, I know it takes extra puff to slow down and speed up all the time. But they're cycling in London for goodness' sake. What do they expect?).
Plus, PLUS, cyclists going through red lights on a busy junction. Where in the highway code does it say that's allowed? Is there an extra booklet they issue to cyclists that says 'It's not strictly allowed to jump a red light but you're on two wheels rather than four and using pedal power so, what the hell, you're a saint and exempt from normal road laws. Go for your life...'
And whilst we're at it, why is it, when I'm out walking through London with my boys, male drivers (or even male cyclists) feel it's acceptable to comment if they think my children are too close to the edge of the pavement, are taking too long to cross the road, or they're just having a bad morning and are looking for someone to bully? Ask yourself, would they do that if I was my 6' 4" husband? I think not.
And finally; please, non-blogging PR people (I exclude blogging PR's - you know where it's at, this is not aimed at you at all), if you've even bothered to read this far down the post (which would be a first), take note of the following;
IT'S THE SCHOOL SUMMER HOLIDAYS!
If I don't answer you the first time you e-mail me that is probably because I don't have the time. I know you're working to a deadline. I probably noted what it was when I read your e-mail and promptly prioritised it at the bottom of my list whilst trying to lead something approaching a normal life and simultaneously being a Butlins redcoat. Bombarding me with follow-up mails reminding me that 'time is running out to participate' will not make me feel any kinder to you when I'm dealing with two children hopping around like mad things. I will answer you when I can (if, that is, your note is remotely relevant or interesting - never a given, I'm afraid); and there is nothing more likely to make me hit 'delete' than a second, third, or even fourth email chasing me.
And - breeeeaaaaatheeee.
Still here? Right. Then I'll begin....
First... Why is it that cyclists in London are so self-righteous these days? Obviously they are doing less harm to the environment than car drivers, I get that, but how on earth do they expect to be given the same rights as a car when they don't follow any of the same rules? For example, I can't count the number of times a cyclist has refused to stop or slow down at a pedestrian or a zebra crossing when I'm walking over with my children. And yet, if you challenge them on it, they get all upset. (And yes, I know it takes extra puff to slow down and speed up all the time. But they're cycling in London for goodness' sake. What do they expect?).
Plus, PLUS, cyclists going through red lights on a busy junction. Where in the highway code does it say that's allowed? Is there an extra booklet they issue to cyclists that says 'It's not strictly allowed to jump a red light but you're on two wheels rather than four and using pedal power so, what the hell, you're a saint and exempt from normal road laws. Go for your life...'
And whilst we're at it, why is it, when I'm out walking through London with my boys, male drivers (or even male cyclists) feel it's acceptable to comment if they think my children are too close to the edge of the pavement, are taking too long to cross the road, or they're just having a bad morning and are looking for someone to bully? Ask yourself, would they do that if I was my 6' 4" husband? I think not.
And finally; please, non-blogging PR people (I exclude blogging PR's - you know where it's at, this is not aimed at you at all), if you've even bothered to read this far down the post (which would be a first), take note of the following;
IT'S THE SCHOOL SUMMER HOLIDAYS!
If I don't answer you the first time you e-mail me that is probably because I don't have the time. I know you're working to a deadline. I probably noted what it was when I read your e-mail and promptly prioritised it at the bottom of my list whilst trying to lead something approaching a normal life and simultaneously being a Butlins redcoat. Bombarding me with follow-up mails reminding me that 'time is running out to participate' will not make me feel any kinder to you when I'm dealing with two children hopping around like mad things. I will answer you when I can (if, that is, your note is remotely relevant or interesting - never a given, I'm afraid); and there is nothing more likely to make me hit 'delete' than a second, third, or even fourth email chasing me.
And - breeeeaaaaatheeee.
Tuesday, 21 July 2009
Life's soundtrack...
Does your life has a soundtrack? You might not realise it, but I bet it does. Even if you can't sit there and list it, I have no doubt that you'll be walking past a shop, an open window, or hopping through the stations on your car radio and just a few notes of a particular song will transport you back to a particular moment as easily as the voice of Tracey Chapman takes me back to Swanage beach during my second year at uni.
I've been at this blogging lark for a couple of years and I still don't know how to embed a video in a post. Rubbish, I know, but if you have a moment please indulge me and open up a second screen, click on this link, and listen to the music as you read my post.
I love The Rolling Stones. I didn't get into them until my mid-twenties, but when I did it was as if I had walked out of a stuffy room and into a blue and bracing beach-side day, all white puffs of cloud, bright sunshine, stinging sand kicked up by the wind in the dunes, and spray from the breakers smacking you in the face, making you glad to be alive. This is especially true when I listen to their earlier stuff.
I remember particularly the first time I listened to this song. I had just split up from a long term boyfriend (previously mentioned here as 'Sporty Boy'), and was driving to a friend's wedding, which frankly I was dreading somewhat. You know; all those happy couples, the ultimate affirmation of togetherness etc etc - the last thing you need when there's no-one to slow dance with at the end of the evening.
And then this song came on. I'm not sure if it's the choir, the horn, the beat, or Mick's vocals, but something got my attention, and I started listening to lyrics. A lot of them are just filler, but the chorus; 'You can't always get what you want, but if you try sometimes, you might just find, you get what you need' stopped me in my tracks.
I started to feel unaccountably optimistic and uplifted (As a convent girl, I was always a sucker for a choir). Far better to be at the wedding on my own and surrounded by my best friends with a lifetime of possibilities in front of me than spending the weekend fretting about a relationship gone sour, I decided, and I went to the celebrations and had a fantastic time. Shortly after that I met Husband. And I can tell you now that he was exactly what I needed.
I know that this sentiment -'You can't always get what you want, but if you try sometimes, you might just find, you get what you need' - will mean different things to everyone, but to me it means getting out there, grabbing life with both hands, and making the best of it. Stop being reactive, bemoaning the bad hand life has dealt you. Take control - you might find you like it. Things might not work out as you originally planned, but if you've given it a shot in the best way you can, then they have a habit of working out for the best.
And the older I get, the more I realise that this is true. If you've been reading my blog for a while you'll know that I love London. It's my home, and I think it probably always will be. Leaving it would be hard. But life is - or can be - an Adventure. Moscow's calling; and whilst we've not made a final decision, I think it might be time to start looking out the suitcases...
(Gosh, that was therapeutic. I think I might put a soundrack to more of my posts in the future...)
I've been at this blogging lark for a couple of years and I still don't know how to embed a video in a post. Rubbish, I know, but if you have a moment please indulge me and open up a second screen, click on this link, and listen to the music as you read my post.
I love The Rolling Stones. I didn't get into them until my mid-twenties, but when I did it was as if I had walked out of a stuffy room and into a blue and bracing beach-side day, all white puffs of cloud, bright sunshine, stinging sand kicked up by the wind in the dunes, and spray from the breakers smacking you in the face, making you glad to be alive. This is especially true when I listen to their earlier stuff.
I remember particularly the first time I listened to this song. I had just split up from a long term boyfriend (previously mentioned here as 'Sporty Boy'), and was driving to a friend's wedding, which frankly I was dreading somewhat. You know; all those happy couples, the ultimate affirmation of togetherness etc etc - the last thing you need when there's no-one to slow dance with at the end of the evening.
And then this song came on. I'm not sure if it's the choir, the horn, the beat, or Mick's vocals, but something got my attention, and I started listening to lyrics. A lot of them are just filler, but the chorus; 'You can't always get what you want, but if you try sometimes, you might just find, you get what you need' stopped me in my tracks.
I started to feel unaccountably optimistic and uplifted (As a convent girl, I was always a sucker for a choir). Far better to be at the wedding on my own and surrounded by my best friends with a lifetime of possibilities in front of me than spending the weekend fretting about a relationship gone sour, I decided, and I went to the celebrations and had a fantastic time. Shortly after that I met Husband. And I can tell you now that he was exactly what I needed.
I know that this sentiment -'You can't always get what you want, but if you try sometimes, you might just find, you get what you need' - will mean different things to everyone, but to me it means getting out there, grabbing life with both hands, and making the best of it. Stop being reactive, bemoaning the bad hand life has dealt you. Take control - you might find you like it. Things might not work out as you originally planned, but if you've given it a shot in the best way you can, then they have a habit of working out for the best.
And the older I get, the more I realise that this is true. If you've been reading my blog for a while you'll know that I love London. It's my home, and I think it probably always will be. Leaving it would be hard. But life is - or can be - an Adventure. Moscow's calling; and whilst we've not made a final decision, I think it might be time to start looking out the suitcases...
(Gosh, that was therapeutic. I think I might put a soundrack to more of my posts in the future...)
Sunday, 19 July 2009
British Mummy Blogger of the Week
No pearls of wisdom this week, or even attempts at being funny. It's the end of Week #1 of the summer holidays and - well, I don't really have to say any more than that, do I? And if I do, then you either have pre-school children so to you the summer holidays are like water off a duck's back, or your children have grown up and moved on. Or, you don't have kids - yet. In which case, what are you doing here when there are vodka martinis to be drunk and wild sex on the kitchen table to be had? (Leave me my illusions, please...)
There are now 434 members of the British Mummy Bloggers' Ning, and looking through them today, it struck me that some of the newer members may not have come across some of those who have been around a little longer, so I decided today to highlight one of them. But where to start? There are so many that I check in on regularly, and I don't want to cause any upset or offence to those I don't name because frankly, I would like to nominate all of you.
(OK, disclaimer made, I can continue now...)
In the end I closed my eyes, stuck a finger on the screen and came up with this week's British Mummy Blogger of the week; A Confused Take That Fan, 30 . She writes about herself:
'I'm early 30s (only just), an ex journo and I like Jason Orange, no make it Gary Barlow, baking buns, daydreaming, watching McDreamy on Grey's Anatomy, stroking my little girls soft cheeks, laughing, magazines, chatting, parma ham, holidays and sun, France, houses, movies and being in love...'
And I particularly recommend that you check out her post on parenting tip #236; how not to impress the school run mums. Getting drunk and messy in situations in which one should know better? Gosh, I'm so glad that I never behave like that...
To check out the British Mummy Bloggers Ning, click here. (Note: It's called 'Mummy', but Dads can be members too)
There are now 434 members of the British Mummy Bloggers' Ning, and looking through them today, it struck me that some of the newer members may not have come across some of those who have been around a little longer, so I decided today to highlight one of them. But where to start? There are so many that I check in on regularly, and I don't want to cause any upset or offence to those I don't name because frankly, I would like to nominate all of you.
(OK, disclaimer made, I can continue now...)
In the end I closed my eyes, stuck a finger on the screen and came up with this week's British Mummy Blogger of the week; A Confused Take That Fan, 30 . She writes about herself:
'I'm early 30s (only just), an ex journo and I like Jason Orange, no make it Gary Barlow, baking buns, daydreaming, watching McDreamy on Grey's Anatomy, stroking my little girls soft cheeks, laughing, magazines, chatting, parma ham, holidays and sun, France, houses, movies and being in love...'
And I particularly recommend that you check out her post on parenting tip #236; how not to impress the school run mums. Getting drunk and messy in situations in which one should know better? Gosh, I'm so glad that I never behave like that...
To check out the British Mummy Bloggers Ning, click here. (Note: It's called 'Mummy', but Dads can be members too)
Friday, 17 July 2009
Bing Bong!
Rise and shine Campers, and welcome to a glorious new day here in Sunny Pines School Summer Holidays Park!
We have a packed day ahead, so let's get started early with our first mandatory activity: at 6.50am it's Waking the Parents by bouncing all over them. Never mind that no-one needs to get up for another hour; there's a whole day's fun waiting for us, let's get to it! And if your lazy lie-abed mum and dad don't want to play ball, a spot of recreational wrestling over who gets to play with the plastic sperm whale culminating in one or either of you smacking your sibling - or for maximum effect, your parents - across the head with it should get them out from under that duvet in a hurry...
After Waking the Parents, it's time for the Getting Dressed Challenge. And the challenge is... stringing this one out for as long as possible! Never mind that you want to go outside and race around in the Sunny Pines summer rain - who needs shorts and shoes to do this when you're wearing your pyjama top and a pith helmet? Prizes will be awarded for the contestants who manage to make it past 10.00am still not wearing their underwear...
The fun never stops here at Sunny Pines, as we move onto the Great Breakfast Moan. What? You've been up since 6.50am without a whimper? Time to put a stop to that! Demand a blow by blow intinerary of forthcoming events from your parents, and those of you who manage to extract a 'head in hands' moment from them before they've even finished their branflakes will make it onto our special role of honour...
At Sunny Pines we pride ourselves on keeping things moving even when it's pouring with rain outside, so for those of you not signed up for summer school, why not take part in our Household Rumble? See how much mess you can make when confined inside with only your brother, some colours and an A4 pad for company! Extra points will be awarded for such initiatives as pencil sharpenings being emptied all over the floor, or uncapped felt-tips being stuffed down the back of the sofa. And never forget that inspired art can make just as good use of crumbs found under the dining room table as it does of paints and stickers.
Towards the end of the day when you're getting a little tired, why not join the Sunny Pines team in our 'Major Play for Early TV Watching?' Start with the incessant requests around 2.00pm and if you're a gold-level whinger you may even find you reach your goal early, in time for Power Rangers at 3.00!
And who needs those term-time-polite dinners? At Sunny Pines, you can join in our 'Dinner Time Complaints Fest' and drive your parents that little bit closer to the edge for extra fun! So you used to eat that chicken / casserole / sausage pasta without complaint on a school night? Not any more, Campers! Demand your chicken nuggets like a good holiday guest and watch your parents' plans for a summer of healthy holiday eating shrivel and die like the sweetpeas planted in the same corner of the garden you use for your unscheduled loo breaks... Then drown the chicken / casserole / sausage pasta in ketchup and eat it all without a word - just to keep them on their toes...
Finally, let's finish the day the day with the Bed and Bath Marathon. Extra points will be awarded for shrieking, splashing, standing up wees in the bath, racing naked around the house, racing naked around the garden, racing naked around your neighbour's house, and then tantrumming because all this naked racing activity has meant you missed the 6.40pm showing of Charlie & Lola on C-Beebies.
And just for good measure, if you can stimulate your parents to break open the wine before they even pour you your bedtime milk, you will gain maximum points and go straight to the top of the leader board!
Good luck, Campers! Have great day!
Please note: 'Sunny Pines' is not a real holiday camp. Any resemblance to persons living or dead is completely coincidental. (My sons are angels). All events and competitions detailed above are fictitious. We are not taking bookings.
We have a packed day ahead, so let's get started early with our first mandatory activity: at 6.50am it's Waking the Parents by bouncing all over them. Never mind that no-one needs to get up for another hour; there's a whole day's fun waiting for us, let's get to it! And if your lazy lie-abed mum and dad don't want to play ball, a spot of recreational wrestling over who gets to play with the plastic sperm whale culminating in one or either of you smacking your sibling - or for maximum effect, your parents - across the head with it should get them out from under that duvet in a hurry...
After Waking the Parents, it's time for the Getting Dressed Challenge. And the challenge is... stringing this one out for as long as possible! Never mind that you want to go outside and race around in the Sunny Pines summer rain - who needs shorts and shoes to do this when you're wearing your pyjama top and a pith helmet? Prizes will be awarded for the contestants who manage to make it past 10.00am still not wearing their underwear...
The fun never stops here at Sunny Pines, as we move onto the Great Breakfast Moan. What? You've been up since 6.50am without a whimper? Time to put a stop to that! Demand a blow by blow intinerary of forthcoming events from your parents, and those of you who manage to extract a 'head in hands' moment from them before they've even finished their branflakes will make it onto our special role of honour...
At Sunny Pines we pride ourselves on keeping things moving even when it's pouring with rain outside, so for those of you not signed up for summer school, why not take part in our Household Rumble? See how much mess you can make when confined inside with only your brother, some colours and an A4 pad for company! Extra points will be awarded for such initiatives as pencil sharpenings being emptied all over the floor, or uncapped felt-tips being stuffed down the back of the sofa. And never forget that inspired art can make just as good use of crumbs found under the dining room table as it does of paints and stickers.
Towards the end of the day when you're getting a little tired, why not join the Sunny Pines team in our 'Major Play for Early TV Watching?' Start with the incessant requests around 2.00pm and if you're a gold-level whinger you may even find you reach your goal early, in time for Power Rangers at 3.00!
And who needs those term-time-polite dinners? At Sunny Pines, you can join in our 'Dinner Time Complaints Fest' and drive your parents that little bit closer to the edge for extra fun! So you used to eat that chicken / casserole / sausage pasta without complaint on a school night? Not any more, Campers! Demand your chicken nuggets like a good holiday guest and watch your parents' plans for a summer of healthy holiday eating shrivel and die like the sweetpeas planted in the same corner of the garden you use for your unscheduled loo breaks... Then drown the chicken / casserole / sausage pasta in ketchup and eat it all without a word - just to keep them on their toes...
Finally, let's finish the day the day with the Bed and Bath Marathon. Extra points will be awarded for shrieking, splashing, standing up wees in the bath, racing naked around the house, racing naked around the garden, racing naked around your neighbour's house, and then tantrumming because all this naked racing activity has meant you missed the 6.40pm showing of Charlie & Lola on C-Beebies.
And just for good measure, if you can stimulate your parents to break open the wine before they even pour you your bedtime milk, you will gain maximum points and go straight to the top of the leader board!
Good luck, Campers! Have great day!
Please note: 'Sunny Pines' is not a real holiday camp. Any resemblance to persons living or dead is completely coincidental. (My sons are angels). All events and competitions detailed above are fictitious. We are not taking bookings.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)